Today I'm celebrating 2 years pregnancy-free. It's a new record

More importantly, I'm celebrating 2 years of this beautiful blessing in my life:

February 20, 2009

February 20, 2010

February 20, 2011

Happy birthday, Andrew!!

*stream of consciousness post of a conversation I don't want to forget*

I just had the sweetest conversation with Matthew (6). We always have our deepest conversations right as I'm shutting the door for him to go to bed. Tonight it started when he was telling me goodnight. He likes to change it up from time to time, so instead of just "I love you" he likes to say different things. Granted, sometimes it's "I love you rascal boogerhead," but other times it's more sweet like it was tonight. He said, "I love you more than anyone else in the world loves you... even more than DADDY does." I said, "I'm not sure about that - Daddy loves me so much he CHOSE me, you're just kind of stuck with me." He went on to say that he was glad he got the mom he got because I'm "the coolest mom in the world." (I had to include that part because 4 years from now when he's a grumpy tween I'll want to remember that he used to think that way about me ).

Several minutes went by (we do a family prayer time and say goodnight in his sisters' room and then kind of "disperse" from there). He went and climbed into his own bed and I tucked his sisters in and then came in and got his music going and got Andrew into bed. As I was shutting the boys' door, Matthew stopped me and said, "Daddy chose you from or to do... what?" I said, "Daddy chose me to be with him forever - his partner in life." He pondered that for a minute. I told him that one day he would get to choose a girl to be HIS partner for life. He said, "Like, a girl to be the mommy while I'm the daddy?" I said, "That's exactly right, buddy. She'd be called your wife."

"Yeah, I know that. So will lots and lots of wives come on that day and I just pick one?"

"Well, that's not exactly how it works, but as you grow up you'll get to know lots of girls and whenever you're ready to choose one, you will."

"Well, will my sisters be there that day?"

"No, it can't be your sisters. It has to be someone outside of this family. But, buddy, no matter who you choose, your sisters are your sisters forever. No one can change that. No matter what choices they make and no matter what choices you make, they will always be your sisters. But you can't choose one of them to be your wife."

At this point he started choking back tears.

"But I really want it to be one of my sisters. I want them to always be a part of my family." 

At this point I started choking back tears.

I went on to explain using the example of my sister and how "Uncle Jordan chose her but she's still a big part of this family, and look what happened when Uncle Jordan chose her - Isaac and Ethan and Natalie (three of his favorite people on earth, his cousins) happened. See, when your sisters have kids, thats how your kids will get cousins."

He thought about that for a while. He still couldn't get over the part that his sisters couldn't be a part of "this family" - I think he was thinking about how rarely he sees some of his aunts and uncles and he was just sad that someday he won't be with his best friends every day the way he is now. Seeing how upset he was (and knowing that he will definitely feel differently about his sisters a few years from now), I said, "You know what, buddy, you can choose your sisters for now. Both of your sisters can be your choice for right now." (I didn't want him to have to choose between them. But he had other plans.)

"But I just want it to be ONE of my sisters because I still want my kids to have cousins!" 

Then he got all choked up again thinking about even just one of them "leaving this family." So I told him they wouldn't leave the family, but the guys that chose them would be JOINING the family. He said, "so they'll all be Rutherfords?" (I should probably mention we were more than an hour late to bed to begin with because of basketball games so at this point I decided to just let it go.) "Yep, we'll all be one REALLY big family."

He grinned from ear to ear and said, "Okay, so then.... WHEW.... goodnight!" I wish I could convey through type the relief and abruptness of that line, it was hilarious.

I sure do love that kid. I know his relationship with his sisters will change (gracious, it changes constantly around here, one minute he's hugging them, the next minute he's hollering at them), but I hope he's always as protective of and loving toward them as he is as a precious 6-year-old.

I aim to please

It was brought to my attention that it's been a while. Okay, it's been a LONG while. We have had a whirlwind of a year around here! I have been blogging here and there for memory's sake but had just marked them all private so I could just "jot stuff down" and get back to life, not worrying about editing and making sure it sounded right and taking any more time than I needed to. Sorry to have neglected you all. Or you. I'm thinking you might be the only one left. 

I will attempt to make this incredibly brief! Our home was finally completed at the end of August and we were able to move in right before football season started for Stephen. As it is a new construction and football season was quickly followed by hockey season and then basketball season, there is still much-to-be-desired when it comes to the "color scheme" of the place, but we have painted the kitchen (twice! We didn't like the way the color turned out the first time) and then one wall in the living room. We absolutely LOVE it here, love having space, love having the pool and playground in our backyard, love that we have practically the same mortgage payment we had before with all of these "upgrades." The house next door was finished at the end of November and a boy just a few months younger than Matthew moved in and they became instant friends. He is a hoot and a HUGE ball of energy!

The three older kids are all involved in Upward this year. It's hilarious to watch 5 and 6-year-olds play basketball. Matthew started off with ZERO coordination - he's really not an overly athletic little boy (except for his hockey shot!) but he's made huge improvements just in the month or so he's been involved. The girls are in cheerleading because they are too young to play basketball. They are having a lot of fun with it, though some of the games they cheer for are rather late for them. Between practices and games and then just regular church stuff, I'm driving back and forth to church every day except for Tuesday. That makes me even more thankful that it's a 15-20 minute trip now instead of an hour!

We had a wonderful Christmas with a large portion of both of our families - if my brothers and their families could have made it we would have had everyone here. I was able to host both Thanksgiving with friends and then Christmas with family - something that was difficult in our old house. I enjoyed every second of it!

So it's 2011, huh? I can't believe that next year is the last year I'm considered to be in the "young alumni" group at my college. Time just keeps whizzing by, doesn't it? Did you make a New Year's resolution? We have been doing weight watchers since January 1 and Stephen has lost 15 pounds in those two weeks. He's doing a really good job of sticking with it - I'm so impressed! He's got more willpower than I do, that's for sure!

Anyway, that's a catch-up post for you. I updated the Lilypie tickers that were out of date. My poor husband saw me on Lilypie and TOTALLY FREAKED OUT that I was making a pregnancy ticker. Funny thing is, he's the third person in the past two days that has thought I was dropping hints that I was pregnant! (PLEASE HEAR ME THAT I AM NOT! Four kids in 4 years is currently doing me in!)

Hope everyone is (or you are) having a great year so far!

(This post is dedicated to/brought to you by the lovely Leanne )

So we're surviving thus far.  It's certainly not ideal and it's definitely challenging, but we're making it work.  The biggest issue is poor Andrew not having a lot of room to explore. At our house he had free reign, minus bathroom and master bedroom (which were just closed doors so he didn't really care).  But I had all the "big kid toys" with little pieces up high where even the older kids had to ask me to get them down and he could just play with anything he wanted to.  I didn't have to worry every split second where he was because I knew the house was safe for him to explore.  Here it's different.  We have a gate blocking off the stairs when he's up which drives him insane.  He LOVES climbing on the stairs and it makes him furious that he can see them but not climb them.  The way the top of the stairs is, the gate doesn't safely stay in place there, so we can't gate off the stairs from the top and let him roam between the two rooms with toys in them.  That is driving him crazy, I think - not being able to really play with anything.  We've got a basket of toys downstairs, but he's used to much more variety.

On top of that, our living room is 1/3 full of stuff we didn't need to unpack for our stay here.  It is just all piled up high off to the side.  This not only makes for a claustrophobic living room, but also means I have to keep a much closer eye on Andrew.  He can also open the dishwasher which is something he couldn't do with our old one.  If I so much as run to the bathroom he's into the dishwasher, pulling out the dirty dishes (which is a problem if there are like raw chicken dishes or steak knives or something in there).  It's just been very high stress for both of us.  He has taken to screaming.  And I mean screaming.  Not crying-screaming, but just screaming like a bunch of kids outside screaming.  But he does it ALL the time.  And he can hold a scream for a REALLY long time.  Since he doesn't use words, he screams any time he's trying to ask me something to get me to turn toward him so he can point at it or sign or whatever.  He screams when the others chase him, even if he's enjoying it.  He screams when you tickle him.  He screams when he's angry, of course.  Where other babies would be babbling, he just screams.  It's really hard to take him out in public because he seriously just screams!  (Do you get the point that he screams?)  Even just eating lunch with our small group at church last Sunday was majorly embarrassing because of how much he screamed.  I feel so bad for him because he's obviously so frustrated - frustrated that he can't explore, frustrated that he can't play, frustrated that he can't speak.  But it's SOOOOO draining to listen to him scream all the time, I can't even tell you.  Not to mention that we're in an apartment, so I'm constantly wondering what the neighbors must think is going on that this kid screams all the time!  There was a sheriff's car parked across the street yesterday and part of me wondered if the neighbors had complained and they were sitting there listening for evidence.  Then when Stephen picked up the mail yesterday there was something from our apartment complex in there and his heart seriously started pounding because he thought it was going to be a letter asking us to leave on noise violations!  I'm sure we're overly paranoid...

Anyway, I wish I could figure out a way for him to more safely explore here, but for now, I'll just keep telling myself it's temporary.  I know it would be just as stressful to still be living in a house that was constantly having to be in show condition with 4 young kids.  Actually, that would probably be worse.  Besides, anything is better than this past week when a stomach bug has hit and I've been cleaning up vomit on top of it all!  Come to think of it, I guess I'll take the screaming 

A week has gone by and we're as moved in as we're going to be.  Apartment living for 6 isn't quite as bad as I figured it would be.  The first few nights were TOUGH.  Andrew pretty much just cried the whole first night.  We also went several days without anyone taking a nap.  All of you parents know how that makes for a miserable day.  Anyway, everyone has adjusted and the kids really love it - more because it has stairs than anything!  The biggest concern is just sharing walls with neighbors.  I get really self-conscious when the kids start fighting or being loudly defiant (or when Andrew was crying all night that first night - I was SO nervous we were disturbing everyone).

Anyway, we have a three month lease here and we're hoping we don't have to extend it at all.  We meet with the builder later this week and hope to get a better timetable on when our house will be ready for us!  We THOROUGHLY enjoyed only driving 20 minutes to get to church this morning!  Made it in time to participate in choir finally!

Tomorrow it's off to the lake with some friends - hopefully I'll remember the camera and we can get some pictures posted.  It's been a while.